An un-balance

A new job and its long hours left me with little rest and zero free time. Every day for five weeks, I spent 12 hours on my feet, commuted 60 miles round trip, and absorbed the emotions of countless personalities.

Night after long night, when my days were finally over, I arrived at my home, walked through the front doors, and collapsed onto my couch. Most nights I fell asleep in front of the TV, other nights I was luckily enough to make it to bed. I lead a Groundhogs Day exsistence.

Soon everything faded into the background, as my work life became paramount. Friends became strangers, strangers became friends, meals became snacks, weekends became weekdays. My life disappeared. These circumstances are not out of the ordinary for those in my profession: round the clock emails, phone calls in the early morning, stress and caffeine fueling an endless cycle.

Even when the expectations and responsibilities are known from the start, an experience like this can knock you from your feet, creating an un-balance.

I started to lose my centering before 2009 began. The Holidays took me for a wild, emotional ride, including a weekend trip to New York City, where in bone-chilling weather, I braved the crowded, Christmas streets to catch a glimpse of those famous department store windows. People all around shopped till they dropped, making their final, frenzied flurries to the finish line. Twas a whirlwind end to a fantastic year, but I returned home unrested and restless.

I stopped writing in the midst of the seasonal festivities and travel, and very quickly, time passed. Two months whizzed by without a word written, and soon my life became an unrecorded existence. Or, my existence became nothing (special) recorded.

Yet all along, like a thorn in my side, or the nagging pain of a splinter, I felt the pull to return to my writing. For me, sharing my experiences connects me to my bigger picture, connects me to you.

Today I return to my balance beam of life. I take back the center. I fight for my footing. I strive to create continuing and lasting harmony in all areas my life.

To balance a career, a busy personal life, the responsibilities of raising a dog, household chores, family time and “me” time is a feat only the most skilled multi-taskers can conquer. And now that it’s all said and done, I don’t know if I can consider myself among the multi-tasking elite.

I’m working on it, though. I hope to become one soon.


13 thoughts on “An un-balance

  1. It is good to see you writing again Ryan I enjoy your style so much. I too have been so busy in the past months and on the road, so I can relate to your words. I have clicked on your site time after time to see the same story and wonder what you were up to.

    Congrats on the new venture and I look forward to hearing more details about what you and Ross are going to be doing. Please tell me that you are going to get your own office or at least a wall like Daria had. Your working area seems a little small and the face to face desks would be overwhelming.

    Keep up the writing as you have a very unique style that I enjoy.


  2. A special gift of words from you on this Valentine’s Day. Thank you Ross. Yes, I knew you were well via Ross’ blog and seeing your smiling face. But so good to have a chance to connect back with you once again.

    Blog-friends in this new internet world become oddly real over time and when they are gone they are missed as deeply as an long-time childhood friend.

    Nice to have you back home again. And by golly I did bake cookies… red heart-shaped sugar cookies, decorated with white chocolate drizzles.



  3. Nice to see you writing here again. I hope your new venture brings you what you need and that you find the time you need to maintain your incredible spirit. Love that you and Ross are working together and I am looking forward to finding out what exactly it all entails. Best of luck to you. Happy Valentine’s Day ♥


  4. Wonderful to get some insight into the abyss your blog had fallen into.

    I hope you do invest in you, your family and friends. They will always be a constant.

    Work is just work.


  5. Welcome back Ryan to the ventures of Writing!. I enjoy your writing style, and I enjoy you. You carry yourself with ease, even though your life is in a whirl wind, and you trying to make time for you, and everyone else. Make sure you have your time, the time to reflect on things in your life. If you have to take another 2 months again, I understand, life sometimes gets ahead of us first before we get ahead of life. I know we will see you more now, through the Ross Blogs, but if you can’t update, its okay, do what you feel is right. 🙂

    Congrats on the new job, and being able to work with your best friend Ross.

    Keep doing what you are doing, and love what you do.



  6. hi ryan! long time, no….anything! got a message from linkedin saying that you updated your site so i decided to log on. LOVE, LOVE, LOVE! congrats on getting your “me” time back cuz it sounds like you needed it.
    i, too, have been feeling that pulling sensation back to writing. i suck at it but i’m trying to document my wonderful world of dating. Although, I fear that my fingers may fall off from typing too much (ha-ha). I need to organize it but once i do, would love for you to check it out.
    anyway, hope to see you soon. until then, i’ll be following you down your written road….


  7. P.S. I don’t think multitasking is a skill. I am of the understand that saying a “successful multitasker” is like saying you are a “happy prisoner”. Multitasking is a survival tool at best.

    Take it from me; a mom, wife, friend, house keeper, fixer upper, student, taxi, employee (not necessarily in that order) -multitasking is my only way of life.

    Life was not meant to be multitasked, it was meant to be broken down and absorbed like sunshine. So don’t be so hard on yourself. Maybe being an “OK” mulitasker isn’t such a bad thing 😉


  8. hi ryan~

    take time for yourself
    smell a flower
    look at the ocean
    or a sunset

    even your own 10 minutes can be Beautiful~

    take care



  9. So glad to see you back here. I enjoy your writing very much and missed you. You truly have a way wih words. You should write a book! 😉


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