Shaved

Seven weeks of growth sat on top of my head. A bit longer than an inch, my hair resembled a patch of messy carpet. With no time to groom, I watched my dark brown stubble grow longer and longer everyday. Somehow I made it through the short awkward phase (a phase where I can’t mat it down or prop it up) and then one day last week I made peace with the process and committed to growing it out.

Not having long hair since 2007, I thought it would be a fun experiment to try something new and see if it changed the shape of my face. “Why not?” I reasoned. “Styling and using product can be a fun way to start the day,” I thought.

As you might imagine, this internal debate has been a source of stress for me ever since I was a young boy. (Keep it short or grow it long… that is the question!) It began when I was in fourth grade when I began wearing my hair slicked to one side, completely immovable. Each morning I obsessed over my part, the loose “fly aways”, and my front bangs. As if preparing for a Vidal Sassoon hair show, I spent hours getting it just right. Rock hard from gel, my hair wouldn’t move even in the midst of a category five tornado. So stiff and so shaped, my hair only became disheveled when submerged in hot water. It was fierce! (I even daydreamed of having a personalized license plate reading: STFHAIR)

In the last three years, I lost this life long obsession to attain perfectly groomed locks. Now, like a snake, I prefer to shed what I don’t need: my skin, hair, nails, clothes, weight … anything excessive, and I don’t want it. Long hair falls into this category, something I don’t need to feel like myself, so every few weeks I get it buzzed. I like it extremely short. But because I haven’t had time for any upkeep, I thought growing out my hair would be a good exercise in patience.

Yesterday, however, I hit a breaking point. A quick glance in a mirror revealed my worst nightmare: really bad hair.  With my afternoon free, I drove to the nearest barbershop and asked for the first appointment. Soon a female hairdresser, the person who would eventually rid me of my misery, called my name and sat me in her chair.

Before she whipped out the clippers and did her duty, we joked about my options. I considered keeping it long on the top and short on the sides. “A shapely flattop,” I joked. “Or maybe something like a faux-hawk…?” I came to the defense of my own hair, asking her if she thought I was doing something irrational.

In the end, she agreed with me, and before long, she was buzzing away. And, boy, did it feel good!

Now I’m sure to most, seven weeks doesn’t seem long at all. But to me, someone who values a streamlined existence, seven weeks is an eternity. Seven weeks of feeling unkept, unruly and unattractive. Seven weeks too long!

shaved

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18 thoughts on “Shaved

  1. Cute! I wish I could shave my head, however my face requires a bit of distraction. I feel better when life is tidy and uncluttered, how does the reverse come into being so swiftly?

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  2. To funny Ryan, I am going through the same thing right now. Most times I go with a 1 1/2 on the sides clean and close with the top trimmed up. So easy to wear no fuss no muss don’t even need a comb or product.

    I like to keep changing or we can get stuck, so I too am growing mine out and am at the 10 week mark. It is over my ears a little and about 5 inches on top. I can make it look okay but it takes time and product, so much work. We will see how it goes I still fight the same battle as you were of telling the barber to buzz it off.

    Thanks for the excellent ride your stories take me on. You have a real talent! xoxo:)J

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  3. GOOD MORNING RYAN, I THINK ABOUT YOU AND ROSS EVERYDAY . I’M SO GLAD THINGS LOOK GOOD FOR THE BOTH OF YOU. NOW FOR YOUR HAIRCUT. WOOT, WOOT. IT’S FUNNY WHEN YOU GET TO BE OVER THE HILL MEN LOSE HAIR AND WOMEN GROWS HAIR WHERE THEY DON’T WANT IT. CHINS AND ABOVE THE UPPER LIP. ALSO WE LOSE HAIR ON OUR HEAD LIKE MEN. WHY, I REALLY DON’T KNOW BUT I KNOW I HATE OLD AGE. SO HONEY AS LONG AS YOU STILL HAVE THE GOOD LOOKS AS YOU DO, WEAR YOUR HAIR ANYWAY THAT MAKE YOU HAPPY.

    TAMPAGRANNY

    PS. IT STILL FEELS FUNNY TO ME TO WRITE HELLOS TO PEOPLE I DON’T REALLY KNOW. IT SEEMS SO ONE WAY. ANYWAYS, I WISH YOU DAYS ,FULL OF SUNSHINE , MONEY IN YOUR POCKET. AND JOY IN YOUR HEART.

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  4. Hi Ryan,

    I enjoyed this hairy story. 😉 I am a hairdresser. As you might have guessed by my screen name. I am enjoying your stories!!

    Have a great Day!!

    Paula

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  5. Love the story Ryan! Gotta have change and it’s starting out good so I think I’ll let mine go all summer too! Course it’s already shoulder length but it will be fun to see what it will look like by Oct. We’ll grow together!

    Tampagranny, you are so right girlfriend. As we age for somereason we start getting more male hormones. Whatever! Go with the flow, carry a sharp razor and enjoy life.

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  6. Ryan, This is the first time I am reading your blogs. I didn’t know of them until Whabbear mentioned it and I found it. I really enjoyed reading what you wrote. You truly have a gift! Really fun to read! I will now go back and read of the past blog entries.

    HI TAMPAGRANNY! I have missed you and Red. I hope you are alright. A big hug sent your way!

    bethinca

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    1. Hi Beth!

      Thanks for checking out the blog! I love when new readers find my work and enjoy what I do here. Keep checking in and I’ll be sure to keep updating. Lots going on in my world.

      Hope to see you around!

      Xoxo

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  7. JOJOBITS, I LAUGH BECAUSE I DO HAVE A RAZOR. MY ONE BIG FEAR IS I’LL GET VERY SICK AND I’LL BE IN A NURSING HOME AND NOONE WILL SHAVE THE CHIN. LAUGH OUT LOUD.

    GO AHEAD RYAN LAUGH. I AM………

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  8. Lol Granny because that’s always been my fear too and I am only 54. Men lose it and we get it, whatever! When I was in the hospital 2 years ago a gf of mine came to see me and brought a razor. We both died laughing! That was a promise we made to each other if we couldn’t take care of ourselves.

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  9. I imagine this post will become buried as it is quite a while after the fact of its original post date. I just feel the need to tell you that I am drawn to this particular musing of yours over and over and come back to it frequently.
    I think we probably couldn’t be much different, but in our differences much the same. Your expression of shedding excess spoke to me in such a HUGE way that I wanted to thank you.
    So, I simply say, “thank you for sharing” and knowing that you understand is comforting in some strange familiar/anonymous way.

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  10. Hi, felt the need to check in on your site (understanding that it is not a daily blog) but needing to connect with someone who enjoys the simplicity and paring down in life to see and enjoy the greater things. Makes ones vision clearer I think. At any rate , as I tend to do, I filtered through checking for updates and comments and landed on this entry …again…so decided to just stop in to say hello to a fellow traveler through life. Hope your summer has been great and the pain of losing your beloved pooch is easing somewhat and happy memories are starting to take the place of the breathtaking hurt.
    As always, I look forward to your next entry and I know it will arrive in its own time.
    Blessings,
    Marejohn

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